Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Behind the Scenes - A Sushi Date (Four Years in the Making)

We had made a deal to go out for sushi. It was going to be our thing. We talked about it, planned it, and determined that it was going to happen. Four (or five, but who’s counting) years later, it actually happened.

Some friendships are predicated on time spent together. They grow by the bonding and investment of time spent, projects worked on, experiences shared. I have friendships like this and they are priceless. I wouldn’t trade them for anything. But every once in a rare while something else comes along. Like Kristen.

We met when our kids were in preschool together – her youngest and my only – not even in the same class. We sat on the Board together, volunteered in the classroom, and participated in the fundraising events. Casual conversations led to discoveries of things we had in common: our love of writing, reading, music, certain specific British shows, and sushi. We became Facebook friends and emailed occasionally – we even shared a book group for the length of several novels. But the one thing we never seemed to have much of was time. Time together, just for us, just as friends, to do that thing that friends do together – grow.

And yet we did. Through the emailed conversations, quick requests for prayer, catching up over curious questions and curious wine at book group, our friendship grew. She has always been someone with whom I felt camaraderie with; someone with whom I could take down the veil; someone to whom I could show the me that I don’t always let out of the box. And I never really questioned it. It was a gift.

Tonight at dinner, it was a gift again. The conversation was more than serpentine or rabbit trail. It was positively Rubik’s cube – as we bounced from one topic to another pinging from the hilarity of the sushi selection into the depths of soul-wrenching that family can bring to the “why” of celebrations that are not necessarily connected with our history. I know there were tears in both our eyes at some point during the course of the night and that at more than one point I laughed out loud like I have not laughed in a very long time. At one point, the conversation sparked into marketing strategy that got me started on a road almost I’d forgotten (almost forgotten how much I loved it), and I looked at her and said, “I have no idea where that came from.” A very good friend will do that for you.

I feel like I’ve been telling stories of friends and friendships lately, and these stories are important. Not just because of how friendships can sustain us and encourage us through the changing tides of our lives, but because not all friendships look the same. They don’t start the same, they don’t evolve the same, and they don’t end the same. They are as varied and variegated as the people we are in relationship with, and that variation is so important to cultivating who we are and who we become.

Is there a special friendship in your life that has grown deep without the traditional watering? Cherish it. Do you have others that you see around you that you wish were more? Invest in them. We are more together than we are apart, bound tighter in our faith and knowledge of Him when we have others who walk with us along the way, and will simply laugh louder and longer when we have someone to share our secrets and dreams with. Friendship. This is a gift.

crystalstine.meI'm linking up with Crystal Stine and company again today; joining the Behind the Scenes link up –  where we show those photos – but tell the real story behind them. The sneak peek behind the scenes, a look past the edges of the photo to the real life behind it.

I'd love to connect with you some more - stop on by the Three Bees Facebook Page or connect with me on Twitter @3BeesBlueBonnet. Let's continue the conversation!


  1. Beautiful post today, friend! Friendships are definitely something to be treasured and never taken for granted. Love this!

  2. Wise words my friend..."Not all friendships look the same." This made me think of one particular friend of mine who has been my friend since Jr. High. No matter the distance between time together she is always someone I can count on. It came as no surprise that the day my husband left that she was one of the first to send me a text that simply said, "How are you doing." During this time apart from my husband it is a perfect time to truly invest in her friendship because it is a gift!!! Blessings to you.

  3. Again with the tears! I cherish you and our unconventional friendship. I'm so glad we are both interested in keeping this alive, especially since the busyness and just plain life, on both sides, could make it so easy not to. Here's to cultivating something so very worth the effort.

  4. I love this... and I am so glad that friendships don't all look the same! I spent the wknd with two couples with whom we have lived life out loud with - all the good and the messy mixed in there together - for nearly 20 years now! It's crazy and such a gift... and don't get together as often as we'd like - but oh when we do - it's like no time has passed! I love that! Thanks for honoring and cherishing friendship like you do! It makes it easy to be friends! ;)

  5. Friendship is such a precious gift...and I love that you are sharing stories about it. So thankful that you are someone I call a friend, too. And maybe we'll even go out for sushi someday (in)RL! Wouldn't that be SO fun?! :)


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